A three year old put his shoes on by himself. His mother noticed the left was on the right foot. She said, "Son, your shoes are on the wrong feet." He looked up at her with a raised brow and said, "Don't kid me, Mom, I KNOW they're my feet."
A mother and her young son returned from the grocery store and began putting away the groceries. The boy opened the box of animal crackers and spread them all over the table. "What are you doing?" his mother asked. "The box says you can't eat them if the seal is broken," the boy explained. "So I'm looking for the seal."
A father was reading Bible stories to his young son. He read, "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt." His son asked, "What happened to the flea?"
A four year old girl was learning to say the Lord's Prayer. She was reciting it all by herself without help from her mother. She said, "And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us some email."
The future of "I give" is "I take."
The parts of speech are lungs and air.
The inhabitants of Moscow are called Mosquitoes.
A census taker is man who goes from house to house increasing the population.
A virgin forest is a forest where the hand of man has never set foot.
The general direction of the Alps is straight up.
A city purifies its water supply by filtering the water then forcing it through an aviator.
Most of the houses in France are made of plaster of Paris.
The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top and you sit on the bottom.
We do not raise silk worms in the United States, because we get our silk from rayon, a larger worm that gives more silk.
One of the main causes of dust is janitors.
One by-product of raising cattle is calves.
The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
The word trousers is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top and plural at the bottom.
Syntax is all the money collected from sinners.
Iron was discovered because someone smelt it.
A person should take a bath once in the summer, not so often in the winter.